Things to Do at Faena Miami Beach: A Social Spectacle That Lasts All Day (and Night)
Guests at the sprawling Faena Hotel Miami Beach can spend days drifting between a buzzy pool, relaxing spa, pristine beach, several restaurants and an underground club. We go deep into the belly of this lavish beast.
Things to Do at Faena Hotel Miami Beach: A Social Spectacle That Lasts All Day (and Night)
Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
The social heart of the Faena Hotel Miami Beach is not a fixed one. Instead, the gravity of the property practically moves with the sun in a distinctive and ritualized experience. Come with us.
Faena Hotel Miami Beach Beachside
The early morning is the favored time to go to the huge swath of white beach, outfit with plenty of lounge chairs and little flags you can raise to call over a waiter. Those seeking even more privacy can reserve a covered cabana.
Faena Hotel Miami Beach Beachside. Image: Ben Schmidt.
The beach, by the way, is probably the most tranquil outdoor space at the Faena, where the towering hotel casts no shadow. Interrupted by a wall of foliage, a public boardwalk, and the crash of waves, no sleek music or voices reach this edge of the property and the staff idles near two pin-striped cabines, à la Deauville. The beach is one of the few places at the Faena you don’t feel under some degree of observation or obligation. The sand is of reasonable quality, and the January water gives a good shock on account of being the Atlantic, but tolerable for those with strong lungs and blood.
Faena Hotel Miami Beach Pool
The Pool at Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
As the morning sun clicks into noontime, a pilgrimage to the pool gives way to all sorts of activity— namely exquisite people watching. By now, A/V equipment is hauled in for a DJ set while staff folds an unceasing pile of towels or delivers red-lidded bowls of caviar, splits of Champagne, French fries, or raw veggies to cabanas and lounge chairs. Uninvited but educated in protocol, a fleet of crows take sips from the pool or nibble from trays of food, both unattended and attended— often to parents’ dismay.
The Pool at Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
The least tactful guests actually swim in the Olympic-sized pool. The overheated ones bob around in the water, maybe carrying a conversation. The chicest ones are sprawled on chairs, either appearing half dead or playing on iPhones. The confused ones have kept their shoes on. Two young ones play backgammon on a Faena-branded board. Someone has brought some sort of rolling contraption and mounts an iPad to it in order to watch a basketball game. And, far from the pool and in the din of banana leafs and palm trees, are two guests whom aren’t guests at all. A waiter quietly escorts them out after going undetected for an hour.
Poolside Dining at Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
Poolside Ice Cream Cart at the Faena Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
Tierra Santa Healing House at Faena Hotel Miami Beach
As the sun crosses behind the triumphant Faena, guests slowly to peel off of the poolside lounge chairs and escape into their suite or go for a restorative pause at the Tierra Santa Healing House, a third-floor aerie designed around absolute relaxation and wellness. The Tierra Santa Healing House borrows from a world’s worth of treatments and approaches to wellness, but generally relies on the central idea of a Turkish Hammam to drive the experience.
Framed behind a pair of nondescript doors, locker rooms give way to a series of elegant but cramped treatment and healing rooms, ranging from a two-person ice parlor to a slightly more substantial infrared sauna rendered in African Obeche and Canadian Hemlock (also the preferred place for conversations about property development).
Recovery Space at the Tierra Santa Healing House at Faena Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
A recovery area is oddly positioned and uncomfortably intimate, with guests lounging in robes in various states of treatment on fabric chairs and sofas. This situation was reminiscent of a green room backstage at an awards show. Two Buddhas randomly frame a small terrace. A well-endowed refreshment table features dried and fresh fruits, nuts, infused waters, and a delightful lemongrass tea. Copies of the Faena’s in-house magazine are convenient reading so long as you don’t get them wet.
Hammam at the Tierra Santa Healing House at Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Faena Miami Beach.
The flagship space of the Healing House is certainly the Hammam itself: a cavernous yet quiet hexagonal retreat with no direct lighting. Rendered entirely in pearlescent tesserae, Corinthian columns climb to a ceiling dotted with pin-point lights evoking memories of a starry night. The room is centered by a warm gobek tasi but flanked by large recessed platforms for resting or conversing.
It was almost daily I took this Hammam to do some simple stretches in the watery air practically aligned to my body temperature. In line with Turkish tradition, guests are expected to keep reasonably covered while in the Healing House.
Deeper into the Hammam is the Herbal Steam Room, by far the hottest room in the facility. High-pressure hoses accommodate continued refreshment and the room remains beautifully humid.
Of course, the Tierra Santa Healing House is staffed by skilled facialists, masseurs, stylists, and more. You can employ their services as enhancements to your visit. The staff here is warm and approachable, motivated by offering friendly suggestions to guests.
Faena Hotel Miami Beach Bars and Lounges
“The Cathedral” Lobby at the Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
This social dance continues into the evening, where a few opportunities to relax await. We opt for The Living Room— an innocently named but impressively secure space off the main lobby. Obscured by heavy drapes and protected by two bouncers and an intimidatingly beautiful host, a hard door only discourages the weak. Some light conversation and reiterating the fact that we’re staying here for $3,000 per night caused some tables to miraculously open up and the drape was drawn back. From this vantage point, a deeply comfortable space unfolds before you— an impressively scaled and completely out-of-date place in the most gorgeous way— minimalism has no room here.
The Living Room at The Faena Hotel Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
Glossy snakewood accents, leafy flower bouquets and a field of pleated lampshades give way to a tall ceiling and a monumental pair of chandeliers. A bar at the far end is reserved for those willing to compromise comfort for the sake of feeling included. The eye is drawn to the center of the room by a collection of relaxing-looking things, from petite pairs of side chairs that inspire hushed conversation to amusing interior daybeds and squared-off sofas and velvet ropes. The room is completely secure, with tuxedo staff positioned in the shadows of the room in the event that something might happen (or —more likely— someone important might arrive). In demand for both overnight guests and Miami visitors, the Living Room hosts nightly live jazz-oriented performances before descending into a lounge-like atmosphere with world-famous DJs such as Ritchie Hell.
The Best Time to go to The Living Room at Faena Hotel
We like to start the night at The Living Room with a reservation for 6:45 p.m on a weeknight. This time is ideal to grab a pre-dinner cocktail and enjoy live entertainment any night of the week. For Sunday through Wednesday, you’ll enjoy a DJ starting at 7:00 p.m and a live band takes over at 9:00 p.m. On these days, The Living Room closes at midnight. For Thursday through Saturday, the band kicks things off at 7:30 p.m. before the DJ spins from 8:15 p.m. onward. On these peak days, The Living Room closes at 2:00 a.m.
We assumed a nightly ritual of taking a seat in a pair of plush seats near the DJ booth with a clear line of sight to the stage. Amid cheetah and leopard print, an army of waitstaff floated around, as we became known on a first-name basis. Cocktails here are strong and expensive, but life feels free, secure, and comfortable here.
Faena Hotel Miami Beach Restaurants
The complicating factor of The Living Room is the full view of the Los Fuegos restaurant which proportionally mirrors the lounge. The separation by velvet rope and curtain gives an air of exclusivity, but the overt visibility gave a mutually voyeuristic dynamic. The intention is for guests of both venues to enjoy live music, but the restaurant feels like an inconvenient attachment.
Kat Cunning Performing at The Faena Miami Beach During Her Residency. Image: Ben Schmidt.
Our dinnertime visit to Los Fuegos, the flagship restaurant is headed by Argentinian chef Francis Mallmann offered friendly service but uneven food. The lamb chops ($74) were so fatty and cold that we sent them back. The staff was very apologetic and offered an alternative dish and the lamb was struck from the final bill. We were given a round of cocktails and free desert as a further expression of regret.
Los Fuegos is not the only restaurant on site. Pao is a grand experiment by Paul Qui, drawing on a range of international styles including Filipino, Spanish, Japanese and French cuisines. Clearly inspired by Faena’s cultural collage concept, the global character of this menu feels overwhelming and without a philosophical center. It ultimately amounted to a highly curated diner. That said, an oval dining room framed by a series of banquettes and an elevated golden horse sculpture is a master class in space planning and vibe curation.
Chef Qui’s more successful expression is the exclusive six-seat El Secreto Omakase. A highly bespoke approach, the fifteen-course omakase experience is limited to two daily seatings and features fresh seafood flown in from Japan.
Elsewhere on the property, the Tree of Life bar is more of an all-day cafe, featuring Latin American-influenced dishes and a full bar under a canopy of tree branches and umbrellas. It was a nice place to pause during the afternoon and offers a clear view of Damien Hirst’s Gone but not Forgotten (2014).
Breakfast at The Veranda as Part of Los Fuegos at The Faena Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
Breakfast and brunch is served until 11:00 a.m. at the Veranda, the outdoor portion of Los Fuegos. Overlooking the pool, the menu here is expansive but well executed, serving breakfast classics in a refined manner. These dishes were certainly the best we had at The Faena, proof that quality can trump frivolous innovation.
Faena Hotel Miami Beach Club and Theater
One can close out an evening at the Faena Miami Beach any number of ways: a walk along the boardwalk, a nightcap in the Living Room, or step around the corner to a basement speakeasy called Saxony Bar, a reference to the historic space the Faena Miami Beach now occupies. Saxony Bar’s energy shifts nightly- we experience everything from a subdued lounge to an energetic club scene. At all times, Saxony Bar enforces a strict dress code, so be ready to impress.
Faena Theater at The Faena Miami Beach. Image: Ben Schmidt.
Finally, there is the famed Faena Theater. Arranged in the tradition of the grand opera houses of Europe and the glittering intimacy of Old Hollywood, one descends a curving staircase into a den of gold leaf and red velvet. The shows here enjoy rave reviews. Faena’s own highly-acclaimed cabaret performances are joined by a seasonal rotation of globally-celebrated music, opera, and performance theater acts. See the current performance schedule here.
